This post is a little different from the first four in the series in that it is about a partnership of two people. Those two were my parents and they had a partnership which lasted fifty five years.
My parents had a very united front when it came to finance. It was a partnership in which he earned and she spent! That sounds a bit like a bad situation comedy but the simple fact was that she had day-to-day responsibility for making sure bills got paid, food was bought and the family was kept warm and clean. They had a joint bank account into which his salary was paid but both could draw cheques on it.
Major financial decisions were taken jointly. When my shoes needed repairing for example, Mother would send me to the cobbler, but new shoes couldn't be bought until Father was also in on the decision.
I am not suggesting that their budgetting strategy would suit everyone, far from it. What I am saying though is that household finance should be discussed and discussed frequently. When I was conducting marriages regularly I always used to raise the subject and was often horrified about how little couples had discussed money beyond the cost of the wedding.
This partnership makes my parents financial heroes for me because right from my childhood I have known that good budgetting means getting everyone on board and communicating, however the details are sorted.
I had a similar conversation with my daughter today. If couples are on opposing sides it can only lead to trouble. Unison is a must.
ReplyDeleteYour parents attitude to money was one that worked. Through 46 years of marriage me and my husband have always discussed finances and made joint decisions.
ReplyDeleteI've always had a fear of debt (although we used to have a mortgage - which somehow seemed acceptable). I think my fear was inherited from my father who - probably because of his past and the time period he grew up in - feared debt and returning poverty (although he was never 'well off') He did take out a loan once and that was to buy my school uniform when I passed to go to a Grammar School. I don't think I appreciated what that meant at the time, but I do now and I'm eternally grateful.
Yes, it must have taken some pride swallowing to get that uniform. That was a real sacrifice as well as the sacrifice involved in paying it back.
DeleteMortgages were seen as prudent, a better idea than endless rent, but there was definitely a sense of rejoicing when it was paid off!
I am pleased to see you back. Just want to say I love your blog and have got lots of ideas from it - both of frugality and of ideas I can use in my retirement which (hip hip hooray) is just 4 years way!
ReplyDeleteHello Margaret - welcome to my blog. I've just nipped over to yours - wow, you are quite some needlewoman!
DeleteFifty Five Years! That is beautiful, so very very beautiful and now I'm thinking back to the wedding photo you posted of them :)
ReplyDeleteYou know that my own financial partnership is always a journey but we are very similar. We have one account, both our checks go in, I pay all the bills from it and we can both draw from it. And for any purchases outside of food we generally consult each other before making the purchase. Your parents had a good thing going for them. That is for certain.